Okay, home and safe, finally. I don’t know what the hell happened back there, but I sure am spooked now. I wonder where Jake is, he hasn’t answered any of my phone calls today. -Sigh- Maybe I will just go ahead and take one pill, just one. Maybe it will calm my nerves a bit.
So I took out a blue pill from my bag of goodies and popped it in my mouth and drank it down with some Patrón. It tasted like shit, but I knew the effects would feel absolutely wonderful! I decided to lie down for a few minutes and try to forget what I saw, or at least what I thought I saw.
I woke up drenched in sweat, But HIGH AS FUCK! The demon’s drugs were in full speed. My hands were shaking rapidly and I felt as if I were floating on clouds and swimming in water at the same damn time! I decided to get something to drink other than alcohol.
Some water would do the trick, all I need to do is hydrate my body and I can enjoy the drugs like they’re meant to be.
I looked out the window to find that it was now dark outside.
Where the fuck is Jake? Is he okay? That bastard better be okay!
I tried his cell phone again, but still to no avail.
Well, it’s only 9 o’clock, maybe he is on his way.
I decided to go take a shower since I stunk from sweating so badly.
Actually, I think I will take a bath instead. I haven’t done that kind of relaxation is such a long time.
I readied the water, steaming hot, just how I liked it. I poured in a little bit of bath salt and lit a few candles to really set the mood.
-Aahhh- This feels soooo woonderrffuullll.
Now I could really feel the drugs taking effect. I felt as though I sounded like I was talking in slow motion, like you do when you use whip-its, even though I was thinking to myself. Or had I actually said that out loud? I didn’t know, I was high!
The bath felt so good I fell asleep again, but not for so long this time. I awoke within minutes, and decided that taking a bath may not have been the best idea. Plus I was just wasting the drugs now, with all this sleeping and shit. I quickly washed off and stood up to use the shower head to rinse off.
Time to be high and naked!!
I skipped the towel step and chose to air dry.
I stepped in front of the mirror.
Came over me.
My mouth dropped in dead silence as I looked in the mirror. I figured I died and this was Hell for me. I thought I must have been dreaming. I thought I was blind. I thought I was possessed. I thought I was dead.
I wished I were dead.
I didn’t understand how I could be seeing this.
How is this even happening? Where-? Where are my eyes? How can I tell that I don’t have eyes? I see myself, with no eyes. But.. I SEE myself!
My eye sockets didn’t even look like eye sockets anymore. In place of my eye balls were just black holes. I couldn’t see anything, ha!, but emptiness in my eyes. I thought I would have at least seen my brain or something..? Maybe? Just.. emptiness. Not darkness, no. Pure emptiness.
Am I seeing into my soul? Am I dreaming? Am I dead? (Why is all the rum gone?)
I don’t recall how long I stood there naked staring into my lifeless eyes, but it was long enough to make my feet eventually hurt. I looked down, to make sure my feet were still there. When I looked back to the mirror… the mirror was gone. And then everything went black. I now knew my eyes were really gone- I couldn’t see anything! My hands searched into the air to find something to hold on to.. but… I couldn’t find anything…
I touched my face, to make sure I was still physically here. My hands went over where my eyes should have been, and to my surprise I was taken back!
“AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!” I screamed.
Now in place of my eyes….-I couldn’t tell what it was. But I know what it felt like. It felt slimy. It felt wet. It felt small. It felt like a baby’s hand, reaching out of my eye sockets…
I screamed even louder. I ran out of the bathroom into nothingness. I thought I was running through the hallway in my house, still naked, but this wasn’t my hallway. It was much too long a corridor. I couldn’t see anything, I just kept running. Running in the dark. Running in Hell. Running by myself and my baby hands with me. Running for my life. Running away from my high. Running in space. Running in frozen time. Running… running…. Running… but from what? I was so high I forgot why I was running..
I stopped. I didn’t know what to do now.
Do I keep running to nowhere? Do I just try to go back? I still can’t see.
Instead I just lied down.
Okay, I’m either dead or crazy. Maybe I should just lie here. Turn to dust. Turn to nothingness like everything around me. Allow my insanity to overcome me. Allow my insanity… to consume me.
To be continued....
Sneak peek of Chapter Four
I never know what comes over me; maybe I know this man too well or maybe he is a regular customer of mine; either way I look into his glove compartment. I always find the same small bag of some kind of white powder along with a small mirror, a razor and a cut straw. As usual, I carefully pour out the contents of the bag onto the mirror and begin to chop it up with the razor. Once finished, I use the straw to snort the drugs. As I do so, I see myself in the mirror. I am wearing heavy makeup; lots of mascara, eye liner, bright neon pink lipstick, and a little bit of blush. And, as always, right after snorting my given poison, I feel the sting of a needle in my left arm. The driver had stuck me with a needle full of heroin. And I black out.